Category: Cycle of abuse

The value of true friends

The value of true friends

What is the value of true friends? Dedicated abusers can be really good at turning up the heat. One part of the cycle of abuse, in fact, is to apply more and more pressure until their victim does something apparently worthy of complaint. For example, an abuser might...

Are abusers aware of their behaviour?

Are abusers aware of their behaviour?

Are abusers aware of what they are doing? Overlapping with the question of whether abusers are deliberate is: are they aware? Aware of what they are doing? Aware of the harm it causes? Knowing the answer to those questions might make a profound difference in what a...

Some trust in chariots and some in horses

Some trust in chariots and some in horses

One of the many difficult and important challenges for victims of abuse is to predict future behaviour. Is the abuser going to change? Abuse often happens in a cycle, with increasing tension until there is an episode, followed by a show of “remorse” from the abuser,...

Those who trust in the LORD are like Mount Zion

Those who trust in the LORD are like Mount Zion

How was life supposed to be for us? Certainly not plagued by abuse. Much of the Old Testament describes what it means to love and respect each other. Not only as individuals: it teaches us how to avoid systemic abuse by making sure the vulnerable are cared for.

God’s clear intention is for us to thrive together in every way. Our physical and emotional wellbeing matter to him. So do our ethics.

Too long have I lived among those who hate peace

Too long have I lived among those who hate peace

What is life like for those who are living with abuse? The psalmist wrote: Too long have I lived among those who hate peace Living with abuse is a daily experience for many. Abusers do not need to fill their time with violence, anger,...

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